Skip to main content

BLOG6- 3AM Letter



3AM LETTER

My heart is weak it is made out of glass lights 
It breaks easily when we have fights in the middle of those dark nights 
My situation is in my imagination everything sounds like a lost bite
I write at 3AM in my room so I don’t spark and ignite   

I write at 3AM in my room cause I consider myself poetic  
I lose sleep and I am gone in 50 seconds but I am still pathetic 
They call me names they break my heart and put me to shame
At night I have no disturbance, writing everything including my rage   

I flip the dice twice to see if I will die or live to be insane 
I scroll through instagram late at night like what I am I suppose to do  
I see some pictures and start writing until I am blue 
I fight with my demons and it is so tight the air is not going through 

The lights are diming I am breathless and I am high as a kite 
I hate the way I cope either I am high with the clouds or hanging from a rope
That’s right; screw my emotions no one listens 
They scream at me till my soul is missing 

I can’t sit down and be someone I pretend to be 
Fake love, fake smiles, people help me and suddenly it’s a public symphony  
Raging thoughts is what I love but I have someone else with me 
Everything I am is lost in the middle of the sea how could this be 

It is the 3AM letter that I write something like a piece of art 
I pray so I can be smart and be ready for the start
My heart was in fake love pierced with a sharp dart
Penetrated my lugs and I started to fall apart 

Everything about you is what I want at this time 
I want your soft touch and you will bring me peace of mind 
Loving you will be a blessing, I am a kid, and I am mentally blind
Emotionally abused physically confused and my stars aren’t aligned

I can’t sleep, I can’t breath, and I can’t eat 
Everything just hits me so deep I awfully sink 
Wake up to the liquor and order some food to deliver
Feels like I am drowning in the reviver and wake up when I shiver

Sometimes I cry till my eyes hurts when no one is there   
Sometimes I stare in to the ceiling then my mind starts bleeding 
My thoughts are bluer, my brain starts to tear and then I feel heavy as a bear
Love letters I tor, the mail was wrong, and I am not even aware

Life is hectic it’s heavy and it is killing me already
A trendy generation, very scary and its killing me steady   
Sometimes I cry and my heart tears  
I got so much pent-up emotions with so many weird stares  

I just keep thinking about you like there's no one there 
Look at your eyes like the stars, and a book just to be fare 
A couple lines wont make it better so let me write in my black sweater
Maybe I can survive this rainy cloudy weather

Leave me writing on my pad with my blue inked pen 
Perhaps one day I can find something better in the den 
But I feel stuck all the time and it starting to feel like a sin  
Leave me to die in peace and we will meet up there in the end 

So I’ll see you until then when my soul is sever and I no longer can pretend 

 ©
Labels:

Comments

  1. Unknown9 July 2019 at 15:12

    I love it Magic Hazzoom! Soph379

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hazzoom14 December 2020 at 00:36

      big big hug to you my dear friend, thank you sooo much.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

BLOG46-Failed Games

    Failed Games last night i was crying in bed last night i was lying on my head the pillow got socked in red the window was hollow and i bled   nothing was the same inside   only my skin and bones remind      you stabbed me again online and i was denied from the love time     i am petrified of people now the poems for you rhymed like a vow   honest with you all the time   sincere with you and it wasn’t a lie      did the poems did not make sense? i thought i am your prince of darkness   you left me for the heartless in a mess   i thought you were different but you had no common sense   i know it was a short while lived but i know you since 2016 but you dipped    you live in my mind rent free you live in my heart where you supposed to be   those long talks meant nothing? the poems were rubbish? i know i am not the sunset ...
Post a Comment
Read more

BLOG39-Inner conflicts

  Inner conflicts   I know that feeling when I get the night flow It's like the right demons’ crawls and show Inside my mind, my thoughts make me small All my worries and fears, they start to brawl   Late at night, my mind starts to race The right spirit sneaks, and takes its place Inside my head, I face my thoughts My worries and fears, they stand so tall   And I can't help but wonder, is this all? Is there more to life than this constant war? I try to hold onto my beliefs, but they start to fall And I'm left feeling like I'm not worth it at all   I go to war with my peace and it's a battle I can't cease My own worst enemy is me against me that I can’t see Sometimes I feel like I'm drowning in the sea And I am collapsing from the inside with nowhere to flee   the only way out is to pour a drink, but that's more deceit I'm defeated, feeling like I'm just a piece of meat I drink till I am dead then the...
Post a Comment
Read more

BLOG-45 HOPE

  HOPE Dear hope, our love was once alive Every moment with you made my heart thrive From the streets to your place, we strolled Fireworks & music it is a story to be told   Hand in hand, time stood still Kisses and love, a magical thrill I cherished every moment, every beat Dreaming of you, making my life complete   But our definitions of love did not align I sought a life partner, you wanted to dine On financial stability, a different kind of affection Leaving me with questions and in different directions   I apologize for the hurtful words I said They were misplaced, causing tears to shed I dreamt of marriage, after seven months that was true But circumstances intervened and it couldn't come through   I'm sorry for the times I neglected your needs Leaving you feeling alone, lost like a seed Family comes first, my unwavering creed But I wish you happiness and I hope you succeed   I wanted to be a cha...
Post a Comment
Read more