BLOG12- My EX

My EX

I'm back from the dead thinking about what is left 

Writing so many lines in my description about what you said 

But my soul got left behind so much that nothing’s been left 

I'm looking for a dime in these words that I have in my head 

My mind is on the brink of exploding nothing more to ingest 

My love they neglect and then they show me regret

I'm writing words with my pen and I'm awfully depressed

My soul has just left and the sorrow is very intense 

I use to have the perfect image about us

I thought we would grow old together with lust 

But you just left and you made a big fuss 

It was a bad relationship that turned into dust  

Our situation was diminished and wide shut  

But now I am turning into old rust 

Every time I dip is every time I replenish

But this moment is not yet freakin finished

You awfully left me with my emotions on red 

Coming back home without my soul who left

Laying in pain with my head inside my bed 

A place too dark so let me put myself to rest 

I'm depressed walking with a fake smile like the rest 

Awfully sore with a heart awfully torn by the best 

Shattered to pieces all over the ground with a frown 

While I'm drowning in my tears and I am suppose to be like a clown 

I had to escape till the nearest town to shutdown

Every time I close my eyes I can see you somehow 

It hurts when that lifetime moment lasted 

And you gave me hope but the situation just went drastic  

I am sad, mad, and upset with what happened in the past 

It's behind me now and there is a reason for that 

Midnight dreams coming in like a test 

With thoughts I can't transfer from this emptiness 

Remember when we use to watch the sunset together

And we would say we would stay like this forever

Remember when we used to make love and the music was loud 

I really miss that I haven't had that for a while

It use to put a smile on my face longer than a mile 

And I miss your face while you were sleeping next to me like a child

I still remember your scent and at night I still scream and shout 

I still miss you when you were beside me sleeping snoring loud 

You said you will never leave and you need me

I miss your words, I miss your smell, and I was needy  

Without you sometimes I feel like I'm in hell

I told you I would catch a grenade for you if you fell            

You punched me and left me in a rail 

I miss your smile and I miss your face 

I miss you now but you created a void of space

I miss your laugh; I miss the way you talk 

I miss your energy and I miss the way you walk 

But that day we fought and no words was spoke 

The words was left in space and between us there was a void of hope

Like a black hole and there was a big smoke 

And in my room I sit down writing wondering where the days went 

My pad I speak to and I vent without paying a cent 

It feels like I have tenants in my mind for rent

Changes took place but everything remained less 

In the middle of the night I cry just to sleep 

I have no voice and the hurt runs very deep 

I have found my outlet for me to speak 

Love is a drug and I am very weak

I don’t know how to cop with my mind or myself 

The sun shines outside but inside me is hell 

I feel like I am in a cell waiting to refill   

I want to sell my pain to someone else 

I pry to god a lot while I am on my knees

To live this life while experiencing some ease

I am in a jail cell waiting to be released

When you told me you are going to leave me my brain just freezed

You are married now and I am happy for you 

But the memories is what I have without you

I feel sad whenever I think of you 

You were my love but now I feel the blue       

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